dear caty,
im sorry that ive been off. ive been going through what is a lot for me to handle. i was going to tell you about my life but then it became too much for even me so i decided to wait until things were more calm to tell you. plus my mind kept changing about a lot so i didnt want to tell you something when its changing every other day. i know i should have told you at least this much earlier but i couldnt even think straight. so im sorry. if you could forgive me id like to tell you about my life now.
school. school is alright. i like most of my classes. theyre pretty boring but theyre not too difficult. and i have a slight interest in them. thats always good. on mwf (mondaywednesdayfriday) i have statistics at 11am. which is really boring and i took a test the other day and i think i totally bombed it. then i have microeconomics at 12pm. thats a little interesting. the teacher knows me as the girl that works at dunkin donuts and every time he does attendance he has to mention dunkin donuts when he gets to me. (although i quit my job, i dont want to crush his dreams so i let him think i still work there... but the quitting thing ill talk about next). then i have gym at 1pm. i like my gym class. it actually motivates me to work out and stuff. my teacher is really nice and has a really soft voice. thats just something i noticed about her. thats it on mwf. then on th (tuesdaythursday)(yeah h is thursday... mad dumb) i have business at 930am. thats a fun class. my teacher kind of reminds me of my grampa... the one with no toes. the only thing i dont like is that he calls on random people and asks them questions. i mean i guess thats good cause itll make people talk so they cant be shy and stuff but i hate it! then i have a break from 11 to 12. i have lunch with tiffany and this girl i went to wilson with named monika. then i have accounting at 12pm. this class is my favorite. its not too difficult and i honestly dont know why i like it, but i do. one thing about school that im learning is that you have to do homework and read the books you get for class or else. youll be screwed if you dont. if you read the books and actually take in the information then youll be set. tiffany is a help. she makes sure i do my homework sometimes lol. sooo thats it for school i guess.
work. well i became a shift leader and everything was going good. i was getting a lottt of hours and i was very satisfied. then sherley quit. thats when everything started falling apart. sherley was like ourmother and when she quit it was like a bunch of teenagers trying to live by themselves. we all knew what to do and everything but without her telling us what to do we couldnt like think of it, you know? everyone thought they could slack off and do what they wanted and a lot of stuff wasnt getting done. then we got this new manager named cassey. cassey is a bitch. worse than sherley because she was less professional. but it was alright i guess. then one day i called in sick. it was a friday. cassey was all "you need a doctors note blah blah" sooo i went in on saturday to work with no doctors note because 1) the doctors were closed friday night and 2) it wasnt that serious of a sickness. so anyways she asked if i had one and i said no and she told me to go home. so then i went in on monday to work and the same thing happened. she said i cant come back to work until i get a doctors note. sooo i called the owner and talked to him about it. im like how do i get a doctors note from like 4 days ago? thats not possible. so he said i can go back to work and not to worry about it. so on wednesday i went back to work. i wasnt really feeling it though. the whole dunkin donuts thing. everyone was either quitting or getting fired and everything was still a mess and everyone started acting like little kids talking shit about everyone and i was so tired of it. so on friday my coworker emily was like "lets walk out together" so we did. i went on break, i left the store, and i didnt come back. i know that wasnt very professional but whatever. its too late to go back now. we called cassey while we were walking home and told her that we had left. and thats that. so now im unemployed but i have an interview with that vector cutco stuff that jess is doing on friday. idk how well thatll work but whatevs.
boys. keaven. aaron. i know what you probably think. well what you do think, im an idiot. i was going back and forth between aaron and keaven as you know and i couldnt make up my mind. sooo i decided to be with keaven. bam. so that happened. but now im single again. cause im a dumb whore who cant make up her damn mind and ugh. i feel awful. i hurt aaron so much and he forgave me and were working on things. i broke up with keaven yesterday and weve been talking about it a little. i know i hurt him too which makes me suck more. im gonna see him today to give him a few things i have of his back and so we can talk a little more face to face. i know he likes me and wants to be with me but i was afraid if i kept the relationship going i would end up just hurting him in the future when he had stronger feelings. blah i shouldnt have dated him in the first place. i shouldnt have ever kissed him or anything. but im a dumb whore and all this happened and now im just stuck. aaron said i can do what i want but if i want him i have to be faithful and committed and drop keaven completely and we still wont be together for a while. which i completely understand. they both want me to be happy and thats the part that sucks. they are honestly two really nice guys and i managed to hurt both of them. so right now im just me. no boyfriend. no commitment to anyone. i guess thats it.
oh and yesterday my mom pissed me off talking about how i never do anything and it just really upset me and so i left the house and just started walking. i walked to taco bell and back home. i was gone for a total of 3 hours. its about an hour walk each way plus i stayed there for a little bit and then side tracked to 711 on my way home. i was gone from 8pm to 11pm. and it made me feel a little better i guess. i was in like depressed mode last night. whatevs. ill always keep a smile on my face no matter how im feeling because im just that type of person.
i hope you forgave me and enjoyed my extremely long letter. uhh... feel free to call me a dumb whore or anything like that. i hope youre having a lovely day.
ihy
dana
im sorry that ive been off. ive been going through what is a lot for me to handle. i was going to tell you about my life but then it became too much for even me so i decided to wait until things were more calm to tell you. plus my mind kept changing about a lot so i didnt want to tell you something when its changing every other day. i know i should have told you at least this much earlier but i couldnt even think straight. so im sorry. if you could forgive me id like to tell you about my life now.
school. school is alright. i like most of my classes. theyre pretty boring but theyre not too difficult. and i have a slight interest in them. thats always good. on mwf (mondaywednesdayfriday) i have statistics at 11am. which is really boring and i took a test the other day and i think i totally bombed it. then i have microeconomics at 12pm. thats a little interesting. the teacher knows me as the girl that works at dunkin donuts and every time he does attendance he has to mention dunkin donuts when he gets to me. (although i quit my job, i dont want to crush his dreams so i let him think i still work there... but the quitting thing ill talk about next). then i have gym at 1pm. i like my gym class. it actually motivates me to work out and stuff. my teacher is really nice and has a really soft voice. thats just something i noticed about her. thats it on mwf. then on th (tuesdaythursday)(yeah h is thursday... mad dumb) i have business at 930am. thats a fun class. my teacher kind of reminds me of my grampa... the one with no toes. the only thing i dont like is that he calls on random people and asks them questions. i mean i guess thats good cause itll make people talk so they cant be shy and stuff but i hate it! then i have a break from 11 to 12. i have lunch with tiffany and this girl i went to wilson with named monika. then i have accounting at 12pm. this class is my favorite. its not too difficult and i honestly dont know why i like it, but i do. one thing about school that im learning is that you have to do homework and read the books you get for class or else. youll be screwed if you dont. if you read the books and actually take in the information then youll be set. tiffany is a help. she makes sure i do my homework sometimes lol. sooo thats it for school i guess.
work. well i became a shift leader and everything was going good. i was getting a lottt of hours and i was very satisfied. then sherley quit. thats when everything started falling apart. sherley was like ourmother and when she quit it was like a bunch of teenagers trying to live by themselves. we all knew what to do and everything but without her telling us what to do we couldnt like think of it, you know? everyone thought they could slack off and do what they wanted and a lot of stuff wasnt getting done. then we got this new manager named cassey. cassey is a bitch. worse than sherley because she was less professional. but it was alright i guess. then one day i called in sick. it was a friday. cassey was all "you need a doctors note blah blah" sooo i went in on saturday to work with no doctors note because 1) the doctors were closed friday night and 2) it wasnt that serious of a sickness. so anyways she asked if i had one and i said no and she told me to go home. so then i went in on monday to work and the same thing happened. she said i cant come back to work until i get a doctors note. sooo i called the owner and talked to him about it. im like how do i get a doctors note from like 4 days ago? thats not possible. so he said i can go back to work and not to worry about it. so on wednesday i went back to work. i wasnt really feeling it though. the whole dunkin donuts thing. everyone was either quitting or getting fired and everything was still a mess and everyone started acting like little kids talking shit about everyone and i was so tired of it. so on friday my coworker emily was like "lets walk out together" so we did. i went on break, i left the store, and i didnt come back. i know that wasnt very professional but whatever. its too late to go back now. we called cassey while we were walking home and told her that we had left. and thats that. so now im unemployed but i have an interview with that vector cutco stuff that jess is doing on friday. idk how well thatll work but whatevs.
boys. keaven. aaron. i know what you probably think. well what you do think, im an idiot. i was going back and forth between aaron and keaven as you know and i couldnt make up my mind. sooo i decided to be with keaven. bam. so that happened. but now im single again. cause im a dumb whore who cant make up her damn mind and ugh. i feel awful. i hurt aaron so much and he forgave me and were working on things. i broke up with keaven yesterday and weve been talking about it a little. i know i hurt him too which makes me suck more. im gonna see him today to give him a few things i have of his back and so we can talk a little more face to face. i know he likes me and wants to be with me but i was afraid if i kept the relationship going i would end up just hurting him in the future when he had stronger feelings. blah i shouldnt have dated him in the first place. i shouldnt have ever kissed him or anything. but im a dumb whore and all this happened and now im just stuck. aaron said i can do what i want but if i want him i have to be faithful and committed and drop keaven completely and we still wont be together for a while. which i completely understand. they both want me to be happy and thats the part that sucks. they are honestly two really nice guys and i managed to hurt both of them. so right now im just me. no boyfriend. no commitment to anyone. i guess thats it.
oh and yesterday my mom pissed me off talking about how i never do anything and it just really upset me and so i left the house and just started walking. i walked to taco bell and back home. i was gone for a total of 3 hours. its about an hour walk each way plus i stayed there for a little bit and then side tracked to 711 on my way home. i was gone from 8pm to 11pm. and it made me feel a little better i guess. i was in like depressed mode last night. whatevs. ill always keep a smile on my face no matter how im feeling because im just that type of person.
i hope you forgave me and enjoyed my extremely long letter. uhh... feel free to call me a dumb whore or anything like that. i hope youre having a lovely day.
ihy
dana
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