dear dana,
i wish you weren't at camp. i really really wish you weren't at camp. i have stuff to share. you're going to hear it all before you see this anyways because i'll be at your camp on friday. but i need to...share? i don't know. and i realized that you're the only person i talk to who will have a whole conversation with me about one small insignificant topic and make that topic last for 5 hours. and that's actually really important, somehow.
but i'll start with dillon. is that where things always start? he broke his nose friday night, for starters. and then his status on facebook is like "surgery in 2 days. i guess i broke my cheek too." and i commented it. and then some girl commented it and was like "oh, guess i'll just have to come over again. lol." why do i never trust him? should i not trust him? i don't knowwwwww.
and i guess i'm going to salem in august. that's in massachusettes. did you know that? i had to google it. yes, seriously. they burned w(b)itches there. which is weird cuz me and my mom were both wiccan at some point. omg!! they're gonna kill us. but that's in august. wait....i already said that.
and uhm....for now, i'm done telling you things.

ihy,
caty.

dear caty,
get the regents credit. but i the worst thing just happened! worse them michael jackson dying! i have to go to summer school! doesnt that fucking suckk? and no i dont HAVE to go but my mom is making me. i passed the earth science class but failed the test so they said they recommend i take it in summer school cuz i didntdont need to regents credit! and i dont think summer school is going to make much of a difference cuz if i didnt understand it when i learned it the first time i wont understand it by learning it in summer school. and it makes me even more mad because one of my goals was to graduate high school never having to go to summer school once! i fail. so my summers officially gonna suck! and its gonna be at like a school ive never been to! with kids i dont kow! and its gonna be horribleee :[
help meeeeee!

dear dana,
did you hear? michael jackson died today. around....6-ish here. (it was 3 in l.a., where he died.) i have a theory. i think that he's going to come back from the dead as a zombie. because think about it. if it was anyone, it'd be him. with all the nose surgeries and getting the pigment taken out of his skin. has anyone else ever even done that? i don't think so. but i think this is the start of the apocolypse. i give it a week before he rises out of his grave or off of the corroner's table. is that weird of me to think? because i always think that ya know, it's not possible for people to become zombies when they die. but he was so...strange, that i wouldn't put it past him. him, marilyn manson and that dude who turned himself into a lizard. guaranteed if anyone starts the zombie revolution it'll be one of them.
and now that i think about it, i sound kind of excited about that, don't i? well, i'm not. i'm terrified of the thought of zombies because with as toxic as earth is, i think that's what's gonna happen when the apocolypse comes. the bible even talks about the dead rising out of their graves. (yes, i realize i'm athiest and therefore shouldn't be putting any stock in what the bible has to offer, but i think that might just be true.) because i don't believe another ice-age will happen. and the world becoming a big pit of fire is too painful for me to assume possible. so zombies it is.
(oh yeah. b-t-dubbs, i've been reading generation dead today. it's about zombies. does that give you any clues as to why i came up with this theory?)

-caty.

dear caty,
its lovely that dilly gave you a hickey. im happy for you lmfao. but i really am happy that you're happy. so tomorrow is my last day of school. i will never go to Wilson Foundation ever again! its so sadd. so im gonna like stand back and take a good look at it tomorrow and then ill have some closure with it! then im coming to your house to have a sleep over! i will be sooo happy and soo sadd. but together we will be extra happy. summer starts! you have dilly! i have devin! and we will just be soo happy. we will be smiling like a crazy hobos!! it will be amazingg :]
i dont really have much to sayy. im leaving on sunday to go to campp :[ but my mommy said she can probably bring you with her on the last day! and you can sit with me and we can talk about whats happened the past week and we can just like hang outt. then ill like sleep over your house for 3 days! haha. we'll have funn. ooh and if you go with my mommy and oh joy you just have to deal with a hour and a half car ride. after that you'll be fine. free food! me! boys! anything! and then the car drive back will be fine cuz ill be there haha. and it'll be late so it'll make it more awesome.
i cant waittttt :] im so excitedddd for everythinggg! and then in september you may be in the same school as me. and we both wont know the building haha. that'll be scary. oh well. :]

p.s. i gotta go potty. :]

dear dana,
i noticed you didn't write me a letter back. that's okay. i know how lazy you are. and how busy you are having sex with nina. nina is gross though. so i thought i'd write you a letter and let you know what's going on in my life.
today i am happy. i went to dillon's house. it was nice. we kissed lots and lots and "watched" good will hunting. it's about math so i told him i hated it and then we were kissing and he said "there's a fight scene coming up." so i wouldn't kiss him and i was like "when's the fight scene? are they gonna fight yet? how bout now?" and then they fought and it suckked.
and now, i have to wear my hair covering the right side of my neck. and i found that out and i started beating him with a pillow. and he was laughing so hard and i told him he was a bad dillon. and he said "you weren't complaining." and i was like "well now i am!"
and his mommy came home a little later. and i like her. she's nice. and she was trying to beat a fly to death but she couldn't catch it. and then apparently barack obama saw a fly and killed it....with his hand! i mean, oh my god. how beastin' is he?
and yeah....i'm happy. that i got to spend time with dillon. it was nice and i was afraid it would be awkward. but it wasn't at all. and that made me happy. it was actually very comfortable, like it wasn't only the 3rd time we had seen eachother. like we spent hours and hours together all the time. that means we'll never be awkward and we can get married and be happy together.

-caty.

dear dana,
i haven't written you a letter in a very long time. so here's a letter. this week, i took my finals. i failed algebra and passed u.s. history. i'm not really concerned about failing. i mean, it's not like my career requires me to use math.
speaking of my career....
i'm writing a story. here's my plot:
a girl from a spy school(named emmaline "emmy", b-t-dubbs.) gets chosen to infiltrate a high class boarding school because the headmaster is in business with the swedish mafia. she tries to stay focused on her mission until she meets max, handsome mysterious max. but when she starts recieving notes threatening to reveal who she really is, she realizes max might not be the good guy she imagined.
ohhh, did i just give away the entire story? sorry. that's what i had written in my notebook. that wouldn't be the synopsis for it ever. i think it gives away too much. not that it matters if you get to see the entire plot before you read it because you can't read. :] jaykay smile.
so, tomorrow i'm going to dillon's. i talked to him today and he was like "we can watch a movie in the basement. it'll be nice." so i told him i wanted to watch twilight and he's like "suuure, then i'll switch it...with harry potter. i have the fifth one." which resulted in an argument about which harry potter was better. 3 or 5. oh, but anyways. he was like "you probably won't even come." and i said, "i'll talk to my mom. and if she can't take me, i'll take the bus." so he said he doesn't want me taking the bus because i'll get raped. but i will if it's my only way over there. because, i was on the phone with chandler like...whenever i was, and he was like "you should just go to his house, grab him and kiss him." and well....i'm not that bold, surprisingly. but i do want to see him and i'll be damned if i don't find a way to do that.

-caterzzz

dear caty,
im not really studying for finals but im getting review time in school. but... monday is my last day for that. but anyways, im like pretty sure ill pass the algebra exam. global (social studies) is the same as what you have. the multiple choice, dbq and essay. i always do bad on the essays but im sure ill pass. english, i always pass. spanish im confident about. i already got a perfect score on my speaking portion. earth science, thats a tuffy. i took the hands on part of it. i think i'll pass the written part. thats the only class im worried about. but even if i fail, i can just take it again next year in 10th grade. or go to summer school for it... but i dont wanna do that. but i think ill pass everything. oh and i can help you with algebra too if you need it. im great at it. but im like 99.9% sure ill be a 10th grader next year.
oh i didnt tell you this but ill be coming to your house after school on tuesday the 16th, friday the 19th, and tuesday the 23rd. i will be sleeping over on the 23rd and we will celebrate summer. we cant celebrate being 10th graders till i get my report card to see if im actually a 10th grader haha.
oh and i dont remember the exact day but i think the 28th im going off to camp! yes im going to miss youu. and ill try to send you a letter. but if not, ill write you one and give it to you when i return! and ill stay at your house from july 4th-july6th :]
it cool that you're putting dillon off a little. i really havnt talked to devin in a while. i kinda miss him. which is weird... since hes not my boyfriend. whateves.
anyways im going to this dinosaur thingy today with my daddy, lisa, and kelly. it will be fun. even if its boring ill have someone to complain about it with haha. i totally just hummed "the 12 days of christmas" lmfaoo! its so not even close to christmas. ohh i started reading the perks of being a wallflower and so far i love it! its very funny and has some stuff in it i didnt think it would but its all good. its stuff we hear about every day! im on part 2. ooooh! and i went shopping yesterday! i got an awesome new bag from american eagle! a cute shirt from american eagle. and $3 sunglasses from wet seal :] and they look awesome on me! and i have a whole cute summer outfit planned out. then me and lauren got yogen fruz ! that cool frozen yogurt stuff at that one mall haha. it was yummeh. and i got a bottle of water with it and its the most adorable bottle of water i've ever seen! hahaha.
ok i think im done nowwww. bye :]

-dana

dear dana,
i haven't talked to you in forever. since like.....yesterday! i've been studying today. i'm kind of freaking out about finals. but i figure, i just have to coast through the math which will be easy if i actually study. and the u.s. history comes in 3 parts: multiple choice questions, dbq essay, thematic essay. i'm gonna bomb the thematic essay but as long as i get every question right and do the dbq well, i can pass that. and then i won't fail and i'll be a tenth grader next year. me and my mommy are going out to breakfast tomorrow morning to practice some algebra crap. it's really boring and pisses me off because, really? when are we ever going to use this shit? neverrrrr. i'll never use any stupid formula's that give me pointless conclusions and don't even give me an answer to a problem. never.
i'm putting dillon on the backburner lately(hmm....does that remind you of what he's always been doing with me?) he's just not that important. which sounds bad when i write it down, but i don't mean i don't care about him. i just have better things to worry about and i can live without him just fine.
ohhhh, and on july 5th, you're sleeping over.
"why?"
good question. you wanna know why?
"yeah. that's why i just said 'why.'"
it's because there's going to be a new episode of hannah montana on and jake ryan's in it and i love him and we love her so we have to watch it.
uhm.....okay, i'm done.

-caty

dear caty,
its not monday anymore. but its still a bootiful day! its amazing that CL is not being so crazy. maybe shes found someone else to love instead of her ex and now shes not sad. anywhoooo. i am in school. i have just finished my final computer assignment for the year. all i have to do now is show up. i dont think i will though. he told me i already have a 110% for a final grade of the year. so im not worried about getting a few more Fs for not being here.
my computer teacher kinda sounds like... idk some movie guy who has a deep voice. but i havnt noticed till now. hehehe he sounds funny! im very sad that school is ending. i only have about 2 more weeks at this school... and then... its gone! well not really but i wont be going here anymore. so on the last day of school, i dont even know if im supposed to be in school cuz 9th graders go home like right after tests and i dont have a test that day. oh well on the last day of school im going to like hug everyone of my little friends that i wont be seeing next year! but... i might have to do that before the last day of school cuz people are going to darien lake that day. also i was gonna have you come with me... but idk if you can. mr parisi is being a butt and said you cant stay in his room. so im not sure. we can still try if you want and if worst comes to worst we'll just leave haha.
i dont like summer that much. god im such a nerd. me and devin will probably hang out a lot in the summer... but hes not going into IB so i wont see him much next year unless we hang out. but im deff. gonna take the foundation bus some mornings just to see my peoples. ill make zoe take it with me. her brother will be on it too! and then i can see all the new 7th graders that are 6th graders nowww.
this is a long letter.
ahh caty im happy! but its so sad that school is endinggg. i dont want it tooooo. :[ what will i do next year? im gonna hate everyone at school. and i really hope you go with me. i dont know anything about the building. it probably wont be as scary as my first day in 7th grade though hahaha now that was scary! i only knew haley. wow anyways. i think ill stop now.
have fun today! whatever you may be doinggg.

dear dana,

it's monday. it's a bootiful monday where jessica's ears are pierced and mine are infected and the flowers are blooming and stephen made a funny and you are a homewrecker.

jaykay. i hump you.

so, okay. apparently, dillon's god-sister thinks i'm creepy. she has never talked to me. and thinks i'm creepy. and then dillon goes "so do i." so i'm like "real nice." and then he said something else and i ignored him. he's infuriating sometimes. it just bugs me.

also, my father has not replied to my message on facebook. maybe he read it and is speechless, like you said. or he hasn't read it. not that i care. cuz i really just wanted to reply saying something.

crazy lady may be taking her meds now. she's much less crazy. and we had bonding female moment in the kitchen today because there was cookie-dough and me and jess started eating some and she's like "i want some." and then we leave and jess is like "i want milk." i'm like "me too." and then we walk into the kitchen and cl's pouring milk.

dear caty,
i understand that your father has added you on facebook. i myself do not know exactly how you are feeling because i have never been through something like that. so i probably wont be a good advice giver on this subject. i do think he can love you even though he doesnt know you because you are his daughter. but i see where you are coming from. he must not have that much love for you if he hasnt been in your life at all.
i am in computer class right now. before i went to spanish i walked past devin and his girlfriend. they split apart and devin came to talk to me. he was all "why are you being weird now?" in a joking way though. i was like "cuz... im nott" hes like "you dont talk to me no more." im like "i talked to you yesterday. and i didnt see you today till now and im talking to you noww." yeah you probably dont care though. anywhooo... also before spanish mr parisi was all "go to class" and i was all "no. i have a substitute therefore im allowed to be late to class" haha he said it was a dana rule. yeahhhh.
but anyways. im ending this letter. good luck with your father. ihy.

-danaaa.

dear dana,

i think it was easier to call him "my dad" when i didn't have to worry about contact with him. it's stupid to get upset over it. i assumed it would happen sooner or later. but i mean, what right does he have to be in my life? not that i'm getting mad. because i'm not. most people do have fathers in their lives.

but just the other day me and gma were talking about him and how mom hasn't had contact with him. and austin asked if he would call to wish him a happy birthday because it was his 18th, and mom felt bad because she had to say "no, he probably doesn't even know it's your birthday." and then all of a sudden here he is. i mean, a) he suddenly wants contact with us(he found a nice loophole to get through mom, b-t-dubbs.) and b) facebook! really?! he's old and on facebook. why are old people always on facebook?

and ok, i reread the message he sent me. he said "i love you daughter." and i feel stupid even repeating it because it was such a stupid fucking thing for him to say. because it's cheesy, for one. and because he doesn't even know me. he doesn't know that you're my bestfriend. or that i spend the majority of my time writing. or that i'm in love with dillon. or i run like a badass. or i choose watching what i like about you over talking on the phone with my friends.

i mean, it's not possible to love someone if you don't know the basic things about them. it's stupid. that's what it is.